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You were where I wanted to be

by Dead Perennials

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1.
When the story began we were two dancing flames Now we've grown into a wildfire spread by fault and blame Bleeding me dry, yeah I believed all the cries But the wolf was always in your eyes, fangs dripping with lies Shovel's worn out from digging down into my grave A hole we started for the two of us on the very first day So I messed up, but was it ever enough To give you all of my love, to give you all of my love Was it ever enough Was it ever enough To give you all of my love To give you all of my love Did you just wanna hear the words Did you just wanna hear the words Did you just wanna hear the words (Was it ever enough, was it ever enough) Did you just wanna hear the words (To give you all of my love, to give you all of my love) Did you just wanna hear the words (Was it ever enough, was it ever enough) Or did you just wanna hear the words (To give you all of my love, to give you all of my love)
2.
Prey On Me 04:16
Don't you tell me you love me baby with that look in your eyes I've been feeling so tired lately from holding my disguise How could I ask to be myself It's too damn hard being somebody else You prey on me You prey on me You don't have to whisper about it, you think I hurt you good But at least I can live without wondering if I should If I should try to be myself It's too damn hard being somebody else You prey on me You prey on me You prey on me You prey on me
3.
Since Dawn 04:06
These pills made sick Washing them down with the same poison left on my lips From the last time we kissed We can be honest, it didn't mean shit So much time that I have spent Trying to be a ghost, just as though we never met Is that too much to ask, too much to admit Blacking out the past, but I'll never fool it I've been drinking since dawn Self-medication while I keep on Hiding behind the words that I write Whatever helps me sleep at night The demon in me is winning the fight I might care if I wasn't getting high Looking back at me is just a shell All he's saying is I'm bad for my health Someone tell me the last thing that I felt Besides waking up drenched in my own sweat To what lengths did I go To be a stranger to myself, it wasn't me when we last spoke In the end was it worth reaching so low I can't pretend I don't have the scars to show I've been drinking since dawn Self-validation through the words in my songs While I pretend that I'm alright When really I can't sleep at night The demon in me is winning the fight I might care if I wasn't getting high Yeah I might care I might care if I wasn't getting high I might care I might care if I wasn't getting high I might care
4.
Shrugging off the shock, heading down the drain Sinking senses lost, burning through my brain I've got this empty space, I drink to fill it up To try and forget your face is the hardest thing I've done The rings around my eyes getting darker as I dwell On the harder times in life drying up the well I've got to get away, wash you off my tongue To try and forget your face is the hardest thing I've done Guilty hearts on the run Guilty hearts on the run Guilty hearts on the run Guilty hearts on the run Guilty hearts on the run Guilty hearts on the run
5.
Shaken up by the misplaced feelings What the hell do you have to say to me now Nothing more than a bandage healing Tear me off for good, save us both some time Tell me why I haven't felt alive since your skin brushed up against mine Every kiss I'm thinking of rips the breath right out of my lungs Fleeting hearts are rarely right, but still I long for one last time To know you're lying next to me Bottled up all the anger turning What the hell do I have to say to you now Fiery glow of my tail lights burning Driving off for good, don't care about goodbyes Tell me why I haven't felt alive since your skin brushed up against mine Every kiss I'm thinking of rips the breath right out of my lungs Fleeting hearts are rarely right, but still I long for one last time To know you're lying next to me Hesitation doesn't suit you well On and on we go, drunkenly running from who we are Reservations that I've never felt All along we've known lust is just a flash, a passing car
6.
I'm the one who fell for your sweet selfish spell But in the end we've both fallen deep down in the daze I can't change who I've let inside Why'd it always feel so right when you called for me at night Soft lips I avoided too late, mistakes I wanted to make Now you're setting me free That's not where I wanna be Keep this embrace held tight Just for one more night Just for one more night Regret ripping through my core as your key turns in the door Left the words I should have said on the stairs of your apartment I can't change who I've let inside Why'd it always feel so right when you called for me at night Soft lips I avoided too late, mistakes I wanted to make Now you're setting me free That's not where I wanna be Keep this embrace held tight Just for one more night, one more night It took a toll on me to see You were where I wanted to be Keep this embrace held tight Just for one more night Just for one more night Now you're setting me free That's not where I wanna be Keep this embrace held tight Just for one more night, one more night It took a toll on me to see You were where I wanted to be Keep this embrace held tight Just for one more night Just for one more night Just for one more night
7.
Window 04:05
After all this time, I'm still no better of a man Building bridges up, they just keep on burning again Hell I'd like to say I at least understand what went wrong Fight with the questions too long, realize the answer doesn't matter in the end The nights we shared, who was I to you But the closest touch, it's so obvious Once we both got what we wanted The remaining trust was swallowed by lust Silence has become the remedy 'cause you know what I'll say Maybe after all we were better off not feeling that way Careless comfort provides an empty feeling, but at least it felt right Pieces we left behind, call 'em casualties of what we couldn't save The nights we shared, who was I to you But the closest touch, it's so obvious Once we both got what we wanted The remaining trust was swallowed by lust Morning light creeping through your window And I knew that we could never turn back For so long I thought I loved you Yeah you proved me wrong, but at what cost
8.
My Bed 03:54
I never thought you'd come back Back to the town where we lived and laughed I think it's better that We don't talk about the past Or who said what last It doesn't matter when your heart's half I don't have the time to waste You can see it on my face Some things can never be replaced They're getting lost along the way I'm too tired to chase What we called love faded away Remembering where we went To watch the leaves change orange and red The trees burned so brightly then We were maybe nine or ten I haven't been back since My simple time is already spent You left this morning before I woke In a taxi with my favorite coat I guess you were never one for notes Farewell frozen down in your throat Yeah I remember the snow On the day you left me in my bed alone On the day you left me in my bed alone On the day you left me in my bed alone On the day you left me in my bed alone The day you left me in my bed alone The day you left me in my bed alone The day you left me in my bed alone The day you left me in my bed alone The day you left me in my bed alone The day you left me in my bed alone The day you left me in my bed alone On the day you left me in my bed alone
9.
Your Bed 05:00
The added weight of a rusted halo feels like two-hundred pounds when you're ten feet in the ground Craving comfort from concerns that capture anyone who's close All along we ignored the warnings of the signs turned upside down, but still compassion can't be found Burning up in your flame-laced lashes, your touch chills me to the bone Another fly trapped tightly in your web Another night I spent wasted Dyin' in your bed Dyin' in your bed The seeds we've sown have yielded no fruit Freezing layer of frost whispers woes and what you lost I'm the dirt beneath the soles of your feet, stubborn soil of retreat Hearts aren't fields and we're no farmers Please put down that spade and hoe, there's no feeling that can be grown I'm the roots trampled, crushed carelessly Our harvest withering in the heat Another fly trapped tightly in your web Another night I spent wasted Dyin' in your bed (dyin' in your bed) Dyin' in your bed (dyin' in your bed) Oh god will I ever sleep again Take me some place darker I can rest my head (dyin' in your bed) I can rest my head (dyin' in your bed) Another fly trapped tightly in your web Another night I spent wasted Dyin' in your bed, in your bed Oh god will I ever sleep again Take me some place darker I can rest my head, my head Dyin' in your bed Dyin' in your bed Dyin' in your bed Dyin' in your bed
10.
Spare Change 03:54
All of these nights I still don't remember All of these ties I thoughtlessly severed Indulging in empty attraction Only led to more loneliness than I ever imagined I haven't felt like myself in days Treated people I love like spare change Sometimes if you can't forgive, you just have to forget I'd like to think I'm getting pretty damn good at that Everyone needs some type of distraction I don't blame you for using me, whatever's happened has happened With one act I set fire to a life long-gone I surely miss Let now be the last time I write a song about any of this I haven't felt like myself in days Treated people I love like spare change Sometimes if you can't forgive, you just have to forget I'd like to think I'm getting pretty damn good at that I haven't felt like myself in days Treated people I love like spare change I understand if you can't look at me the same way l'm sorry that you can't look at me the same way The same way, the same way The same way, the same way, the same way, the same way The same way, the same way, the same way

about

Recorded throughout 2015 and 2016, starting with an April 2015 session at a ranch in Descanso, CA before finishing the rest at Steve Tanner's home studio in Vista, CA; mostly inspired by my time living in Flagstaff, AZ

credits

released January 27, 2017

Matt Haynie - vocals (1-10), electric guitar (1-6, 9, 10), acoustic guitar (4, 7, 8, 10)
Willis Farnsworth - bass (1-3, 5, 6, 9), pedal steel (4, 5 , 8, 9)
Steve Moak - drums (1-3, 5, 6, 9), backing vocals (1, 9)
Jeff Starkey - lead guitar (1-3)
Matthew Dekker - organ (2), electric piano (3)
Ryan Grenda - backing vocals (1, 9)

Tracks 1-3, 5, 6, 9 recorded live to tape by Ryan Grenda
Tracks 4, 7, 8, 10 and overdubs on all tracks recorded to tape by Steve Tanner
Mixed down to 2-track tape by Steve Tanner & Matt Haynie
Mastered by Bryan Stratman at Capricorn Studios in San Diego, CA

Artwork by Sawyer Scantlebury

All songs written by Matt Haynie

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Dead Perennials San Diego, California

Dead Perennials is the music of San Diego songwriter Matt Haynie

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